It’s the scariest and most exciting thing a man will ever face: fatherhood. Suddenly there’s the pressure of knowing this human life is wholly reliant on you, the hope of being just like your father or the fear of the same thing. It’s the moment when BC becomes AD, a distinct frozen moment when a corner is turned and there will forever more only be a “before” (child) and “after”.
Maybe it was planned and maybe it wasn’t, but that wife/spouse/partner/friend/blackmail associate is pregnant, and everything is about to change. You won’t look at that crying baby on the airplane the same way, that “hot college girl” is suddenly someone’s daughter, and getting up at 6 a.m. on a Saturday won’t seem weird.
For many of us, Father’s Day means finding the right gift for Dad. But now some of us will be receiving gifts as well, and so without further ado, we introduce New Father’s Day — along with a wish list for the sleep-deprived new dad to make the beginning of this next lifetime easier.
BUT FIRST, A FUN MOMENT IN GEARHEAD FATHERHOOD
Gus Modern Sparrow Glider
When you and your wife awake for the 17th time and are barely a shred of alive, you’ll need to simplify the simplest of tasks. A glider is a perfect way to feed and soothe your baby, but many of them look like they belong at your grandma’s house as the extra chair for Thanksgiving dinner. Gus Modern offers stylish pieces that can remain as a furniture piece after the baby has grown (or last you through a few more babies).
4Moms Breeze Play Pen
Ever tried to pitch a tent at midnight in driving rain? This is what it feels like to erect a pack-and-play/portable crib on the go. The Breeze from 4Moms (and Dads, we might add) takes one touch to open and one pull to close. Brilliant.
Skip Hop Messenger Bag & Via Backpack
Carrying your child around is a badge of honor. Still, looking like you had Lisa Frank turn your sister’s 8th grade Trapper Keeper into a diaper bag negates all street cred you had otherwise accrued through cool Dadness. Skip Hop’s urban-design messenger bags and backpacks keep your masculinity intact. Retaining said masculinity after your baby pees all over your shirt, however, cannot be helped.
Cup holders, adjustable suspension settings and an aluminum frame. The newest from Ingolstadt? Nicht! Welcome to the stroller world. About five months ago my wife and I began shopping for strollers for our first child, and we were subsequently overwhelmed by options, colors, styles, brands and price points. We found it amusingly similar to buying a car. Everything — from taking one out for a “test drive” to the universal truth of European design being better looking with less space and no cup holders — rang true. Features like UV protection, swivel bases and packability became the horsepower, handling and trunk space I’m used to dealing with. Just like cars, too, there is a huge range in price; just as similar was the rule that good looks don’t mean quality. So take your time, ask questions, do your online research and decide what features are important, because it’s where your baby (and you) will be spending a lot of time.
Withings Smart Baby Monitor
Having our phones with us all the time makes baby monitoring easy. The Withings Smart Baby Monitor has an Apple-esque design; plays music; pans, tilts and pinch-zooms; and monitors temperature and humidity in the room. Two-way intercom means you can talk to baby, and the infrared night light comes on automatically. Connect via wi-fi or bluetooth to know what’s happening, no matter where you are.
Nursery Works District Crib
Re-purposed wood from an Alabama train depot with a non-toxic, zero VOC, natural oil- and wax-based finish make this crib both unique and entirely safe for baby. Not only does it look fantastic, but it can be converted into a desk after its occupant has grown — which is good, because you might need another job to pay off the $5K price tag.
UPPAbaby Vista Convertible Stroller System
With an adjustable handlebar so tall dads don’t hurt their back while stroll(er)ing, an infant seat that can face forwards or backwards and recline with one lever, shock absorbing wheels, a UV shield for the included bassinet and large storage area underneath, this stroller blows most others off the sidewalk. It stands on its own once folded and can be expanded for up to three kids at once for the really
fertile lucky fathers out there.
F.I.T. Jogger Stroller
Thought your cross-fit and tough mudder days were done? How about adding a true challenge to your jog? Running with your baby is a great way for both of you to get outside and spend time together, but jogging with a bad running stroller is like working out in dress shoes — possible, but not at all enjoyable. The F.I.T. jogger has three wheels (a must for jogging strollers), a hand brake to maintain control down hill, big tires and lightweight material to keep you in shape and your passenger happy. Hooray, multitasking.
Green Sprouts Infant Water Bottle Adapter Cap
You cleaned out your house to make way for this baby and now you’re starting to get an influx of “stuff”. Anything you can do to simplify your diaper bag (the new dad’s EDC) is a big help. This water bottle adapter from Green Sprouts turns any water bottle into an infant bottle. No more extra pieces laying around like a bad tupperware party.
Car Seat Sun Shade
As you know from painful experience, metal seatbelts can become extremely hot on a normal summer day. This sun shade can keep the car seat up to 26 degrees cooler, meaning no burns for baby and no need to blast the AC in the parking lot for 20 minutes to cool everything down.
RaZbaby Keep-it-Kleen Pacifier
Usually freaking out about the baby’s dropped pacifier disappears after the first kid. But this is your first one, and every germ and disease is out to get them. One less worry, thanks to a smart design that raps the pacifier once it falls from baby’s mouth, is well worth the $5.